Canon's Diary

Action without thought is empty; thought without action is blind – Goethe

While living with schizophrenia, I move between Tokyo and Osaka. Through this journal, I hope to quietly share moments from my daily life—and memories from the journey I’ve taken with my illness.

Sunday, July 13th.
It’s scorching hot just stepping outside during the day. The sun is blinding.
I hopped on my bike to go shopping, only to find it had soaked up the sun’s heat under its black cover—so hot it could fry an egg. After riding, I took off my helmet and my head was drenched in sweat.

I recently bought a bigger backpack, so I stuffed my groceries into it and carried them home. Still, once you add drinks and such, it’s heavy—and above all, it’s hot.
A motorcycle ride is supposed to let you cut through the air with a pleasant breeze, but on a day like today, the wind is lukewarm and anything but refreshing. Waiting at a traffic light, all I could think was, “Come on, give me a break…”

I squinted under the blazing sun as I walked from the parking lot to my apartment. I must have had quite the grimace on my face.

The moment I got inside, I switched on the air conditioner and turned on the fan. I wiped my face with a towel and let the fan breeze wash over me—a small moment of bliss.
I had tennis lessons at 2 PM, so I needed to have lunch early. I turned on the kitchen fan, boiled soba noodles on one burner, and simmered pork, carrots, and cabbage on the other. I added bonito stock to the soba sauce for extra flavor, then poured the hot soup over the noodles in a bowl and topped it with chopped green onions.
Maybe I’m the only one who craves hot soba on a day like this.

After lunch, feeling cozy and satisfied, I headed out for my tennis lesson.
Just like yesterday, there were only four students today, so I got to hit plenty of balls—great practice. The coach who’s been in charge of my lessons since July is still relatively new to me. We haven’t had that many rallies yet, but he’s really good. I wonder who he is. Once we’re more familiar, I’d like to ask about his background.

It was another tough session, and my body’s pretty beat. If I don’t keep my swing relaxed, the fatigue sticks with me. Coaches do this all day, every day—it’s honestly impressive.

Back home, it was time to prepare dinner. Tonight was spinach and bacon cream pasta.
While the pasta boiled, I sautéed the bacon and spinach, added milk and brought it to a gentle boil. A bit of grated cheese and garlic finished off the sauce, then I tossed in the pasta. Adding a little pasta water at the end seems to keep it from getting clumpy. I also made a salad with some lettuce that was on its last legs. It all turned out delicious—a perfect way to wrap up the day. I let out a contented sigh.

Oh right, today’s the Wimbledon final. Sinner vs. Alcaraz. I’d love to watch it, but it doesn’t start until midnight…
No way I can pull that off, not with work starting up again tomorrow.
Still, I’ve got tomorrow’s tasks pretty much sorted in my head. Today’s lesson was intense and left me a bit stressed, so maybe I’ll try a weekday evening lesson next time.

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