Canon's Diary

Monday, July 7th.
Clear skies.
It’s Tanabata today, but I have no plans to meet my own Orihime.
She’s probably busy working at the pharmacy in Tokyo, and I’m here in Osaka, having just finished my tenth technical document.

I wonder when it started—this gradual growing apart.
Maybe it’s because I wrote about my wife in yesterday’s post that I find myself thinking about it again.
Whenever we talk, she almost mechanically disagrees with me.
Her replies always begin with “But…”

We’ve been together for over 25 years, so I know by now that it’s unconscious on her part.
When we first met, it didn’t bother me much.
“I guess she has her own way of seeing things.”
That’s all I thought back then.

But as we spent more years together, I began to realize it wasn’t that simple.
She’s not expressing a different opinion based on her own beliefs.
Perhaps, by denying me, she’s somehow managing to hold herself together.

Since realizing that, I can’t talk to her the way I used to.
It’s still manageable over LINE, but face-to-face conversations have become a little hard.
Now that we’re living separate lives in Tokyo and Osaka, maybe I should use this time to sort out my feelings.

For lunch, I had chirashi sushi and mozuku seaweed soup at the company cafeteria.
There was also a star-shaped croquette, in the spirit of Tanabata.
It’s been a while since I’ve eaten something vinegary.
For the sake of better nutrition, maybe I’ll start adding dishes like that to our meals at home.